A poem in the form of an unfair hatchet job after reading the work of Kathleen Wakefield
Yes, it was just one poem,
I read, something about
grace, birds, bees, the beauty
of nature, and the melancholy life
of human beings, but it was so
insufferably boring and predictable
I wanted to throw up. Instead,
I imagined myself
arguing with her (okay, a monologue)
in which I brought out all of my perverse
sexual behavior
and put it on display, as if
to say, Fuck you Kathleen Wakefield!
What do you know about grace?
I imagined telling her of the tremendous girth
a penis acquires at all the wrong times
-- when your choking and gagging, or
when your ass is impaled, and some idiot's thrusting,
not at all delicately, in the wrong place.
But it would be wrong to make such complaints
about her life
after reading one single poem,
and so I demurred, being fair-minded
and all that, so-called, jazz we tell ourselves
corresponds to the word, decency.
But it wasn't her poem that changed
my mind -- no, not her verse,
so clean and precisely verbose,
eloquent to excess, no line break untweaked.
It was the crass grab
for my attention made by TV announcers
broadcasting the past
in prime time for their advertisers.
Just four silly skaters, two pairs, dancing on ice
while the world burned beneath them.
One woman, one man, competitive equals
in suffering, trying to overcome flaws
that threatened each of their universes.
The man, for his guilt at having dropped
his partner's pale face on the ice
two years ago, almost quitting the sport
but gutting it out, all for her to have a chance
at the gold . . .
And the woman, who fell
yesterday afternoon, after being spun too far
around by the two strong arms of her partner,
crashing to her knees in distress
at having failed. Nonetheless, still getting up
despite the pain she so clearly felt
in her knees, in her mind.
One strong, one frail
in appearance, both lost
to themselves, to their persistence
in conquering fears, conquering fate, finishing
their programs, falling down
to the ice at the end, in humility, in tears,
in sheer goddamned relief.
Isn't that grace?